We "Settling" now??

"Most of you will never fall in love and will marry out of fear of dying alone" I saw this on twitter and it got me thinking.. and even a little scared...

I've never been in LOVE before... I'm guilty of using the L-word carelessly... mainly out of pressure cause maybe the guy says they love you and u feel the need to return the favor.... but honestly, I'm pretty sure, no scratch that, I'm 100% sure I've never been in love!..

You know the kind of love that Shakespeare would describe, the I-can't-live-without-you kinda love (hey I mean that literarily!)..  Love is much more than butterflies in your tummy and all that temporary feelings.. Love's DEEP!!!

Honestly, the reason why I haven't been in a really serious relationship is because... I am  TEAM "Say no to Settling"... I feel like there is no point getting into something if that *spark* is not there from the get go...

One of my biggest fear is getting married to someone in the hope that I'd learn to fall in love w the person.. or just because I want to fit into the society...

I really want to know what it feels like to actually be in Love w someone....  me I don't want to settle!!!... Habibi, please where the hell are you?!?!?!.. lol

xoxo

The Little Things....

So I saw this random tumblr link when I was reading one of my favorite blogs...  On that tumblr page,  people just put up the little random things that make them go awww, or smile... pretty much random things that make you  HAPPY...

Here are some of those things that relate to me:

• Re-reading Conversations.... (I always do that!!!)

• Logging onto FaceBook on your birthday.. :D

• Free stuff!!!!.... (This goes without saying )

• Peeling dried off glue!!!.. (Thought I'd have outgrown this habit)

• Having deep conversations w people

• When someone tells you that you smell nice

• When  the deadline of  project is extended!!!!....... (Have you met "Ms P"?... yh, that would be me!!!)

• When that your very random wish becomes reality

• Looking at old year books and photographs

• Seedless grapes.. (so random but it's so much less stressful)

• Drinking cold water when you're really thirsty.. (it tastes so good then)

• Turning on the TV just in time for your favorite show ^_^

• Dresses with pockets

• Taking your bra off at the end of the day

• Waking up and realizing you have more time to sleep *whoop*

• Getting new school supplies!!.. hahaha (Need I remind you of my Nerdy status?)

• Having breakfast for dinner.. (I'm not a morning person so I always enjoy my cereal at night)

• The cold side of a pillow!

• The smell after it rains... (there is something serene about it)

• Looking through your school work from when you were young

• Fresh baked bread... #yum

• Cute sneezes

• Someone telling just you a secret

• Changing into sweatpants/ pjs at the end of the day.... (Jeans are so uncomfortable... uggghh

• Discovering a song and instantly loving it

• Being Able to Fall asleep right away

• Feeling confident when turning an exam

• Finally remembering the word you had on the tip of your tongue

• The feeling of relief after finding something you thought you lost 

• Rapping an entire part of a song perfectly ... (SMH Vanity!!!)

• Seeing bus drivers wave to each other! .. (I thought this was just me.. lol)

• Feeling accomplished at the end of the day

• Finding out someone likes you( well someone I like back or could possibly like back :/ )

• The first bite of food when you're really hungry!.. (That's when it's the sweetest)

• Waking up and realizing your bad dream wasn't real... *whew*

• The fresh feeling after brushing your teeth

• When your favorite favorite part of a song comes up

Say No to Constant Rants!

Hmmppphh.. .. I was thinking to go in with the usual rants about my life and the other baggages that come with it.. then I figured why not do the opposite and blog about happy things I mean, this is could also be an avenue to air out good stuff yah?

Of course with my Nerdy status..  u know the good stuff I'd obviously start off with is my grades this semester :P
This semester was awesome!.. *Thx God* my prediction is 3As and a B (FACK FACK FACKIDI FACK!) I'm still so mad about that B.. could have done so much better..
since we talking about the good stuff I left out the one I barely passed of which I'd retake this summer just for a better grade ;) #NerdThings


Moving on... Summer started super slooowwwwwww for me.. In fact it still hasn't kicked off.. the hell?? I  want a good JOB!!.. arggggghhhhh Not even a single interview??.. what is wrong with them?? they mad??.. coz the problem is definitely not with me or my well put together resume.. they better recognize! Freaking, its already the 7th of May.. and no Pay cheque.. like how am I supposed to shop AKA be happy?.. this people be messing with me!!!

Oh woow breath Girl, we said no rants on this post and it's just the second paragraph and we already at it... *inhales*exahales*inhales*exhales*

So a little birdie told me it's Mothers' day today again?.. I feel like I already sent my Mums like two "Happy Mothers' Day" texts this year... no thanks to all 'em twitter ppl for all the confusion... *side eye*

 Another thing to be the thankful about is my Mum.. she's almost puurfect! (yh I use "almost" coz I'm old enough to know it's impossible to be perfect, you can only try) Love you so much ma!!!!!

You know, as you grow older you begin to see why your ma said to or not to do a certain thing....  you realize it has always been for your own good and it came from a very good place..  Sometimes, it scares me that I just might not be able to keep up with the standards she set.. but then again who knows? I may be even better!!!

Thought to use this post to say a big Thank you for everything.. for the laughs, the tears, the unconditional love, for understanding me, not being judgmental, good parenting, selflessness... I actually can go on and on... oh and not forgetting the occasional spanks too..... *sigh*

#DearFutureHusband...

DEAR FUTURE HUSBAND,

First off.. what took you so long?!?!?!..

You know as a little girl.. I had this plan in my head.. I'd get married at 24 tops to the guy I would have been dating for say 3 years?... well I'm 21 now.. and I don't see u :( LOL

I'd call you "Habibi".. that's arabic for "my love/dear"... I'm sure you'd love it!!!!... you need to hear me say it.. so sexy ;)

You can call me whatever you want so far it is not "Iya___ " even when we have kids o.... uhhhh hells no!... O.o

I'm sure already know that I'm pretty special.. but some how you chose me!..

When you ask me if something's wrong and I say no.. tsk tsk pls don't believe me... keep asking.. You have to possess a special power that allows you to hear what I'm not saying

I have mood swings occasionally, so don't take it to heart when I don't wanna play.. It's not like I'm drifting.... I'm just not in the mood

If you have a huge problem with my hairnets and wrappers.. no problem.. I'd stay away from 'em so far you always looking super haat for me..... oh yah on that note....  please no "double standard" in our marriage o.... if it applies to me, it applies to you as well.. #period

See, I really hope I'd get along with your family.. that's the plan.. but this is reality and inlaws aren't always the nicest, so if any of your ppl disrespects me,  pls don't just stand there looking clueless with you mouth open.. ha! --.--

I really hope you are not stingy.. that would really suck!!.. :/

It's really hard for me to let people in completely... since we'd be getting married I probably would have.. or be willing to.. so I beg you... please don't break me... coz I'd trust you and it's difficult for me to rebound when trust is broken

I hope you'd chip in and help me out with the house chores... honestly Habibi, you'd have to.. coz I'm a lazy bum sometimes....

Habibi, which kind of wife would you like me to be?

Wife #1 is The oppressed and vulnerable wife that doesn't dare voice her opinion because she's just a mere housewife that depends 100% on you.. and because you know you have the upper hand, u disrespect her, cheat on her what not... Her self esteem is on a neg.... The only goal she has in life is to take good care of you and keep you happy at all times... without ever complaining!!! (GONE ARE THOSE DAYS!!!)

Wife#2 is done w all the oppression and finally gathers the courage to stand up to you... she is The FRUSTRATED WIFE.. she can afford to do that cause she has a plan B.... probably some small business on the side or she might have been stealing from you and saving up for the rainy days.. she is not afraid of you anymore and is ready to up and leave if it comes down to it.. 

Wife#2 will rather be alone than put up with your madness.. hell, she is ready to beat the madness out of  you!... 

Wife#3 (The INTIMIDATING WIFE) The pic says it all... This is the 9-5 woman who is earning way more than you..  there's no point for you to even work cause she gat u and the fam... now you don't expect her to come back from a long day to cook and clean??.. yah the tables have turned.... whaaaat!!!!!!... This "wife of future" is so gonna happen.. think about it, nowadays, girls are more serious in school than guys.. and they are getting the better jobs these days..  Who run this Mutha.....?!?!?!

After all is said, I feel like all the cases are extreme.. I don't plan on being the oppressed housewife or the frustrated one or even the intimidating wife.. there has to be a balance somewhere right?.. 

I'd cook and clean, call you out when needed because I'm not afraid of you and since I'd be working as well as u, I'd need you to cut me some slacks and help me out once in a while w the cooking and things....  There, my dear, is your perfect wife!!! *thank me later*

I think I'm kinda a wussy when it comes to kids.. hope you'd help me not "SPARE THE ROD" for our children... when they come.. :)

See Habibi, I don't mind you interacting with other females and having female friends.. but for the love of God... Please know where to draw the line.. I'm sure I'd LOVE you so it will tear me apart if you ever cheated on me... oh yh.. and no second wives too That's coz I know you'd be Muslim... and some of y'all think it's ok.. but with US.. I'm telling you it's NOT!!!..

oh one more thing, I hope you'd never lay your hands on me.... hmmmm.. I'd kill you......I don't know what I'd do.. coz I'd be vulnerable...  but really, I hope you remain the gentle man I agreed to marry and not turn into a beast over night :/

DIVORCE is not an option o.. we have to work it out.. so now that we haven't met.. you better test all the waters you need to.... cause when we married.. that's it.. don't worry I'd be here testing my waters too.... so far I end up with you...

Right about now, I'm not the best cook... you know the kind of food that blows your mind?.. yah that one.. I can't give you that..yet... but  hey! I'm working on it.. hopefully by the time we get married.. I'd be good.. see Habibi, I have your interest at heart :p

I'd like for you to be a good father, best friend, brother, mentor all in one... you can do that right?

Habibi, I haven't met you yet but I LOVE YOU with the length, breadth and depth that my soul can reach....I'd be the very best I can and over look all our shortcomings....

Love Always,

S