21 QUESTIONS?????

I turned 21 last week.. yay!!!!.. not.. Look I'm very thankful to God for my life and that of my fam's but that was almost the worst bday ever.. first off, don't think I was mentally prepared to turn 21.. like really, being twenty-one is a FACKING BIG DEAL!!!!.. and I don't know, wasn't just ready for it.. I have t grow up fasst I guess.. Life's not waiting for me

I'm always super excited for all my other b-days.. not like I'm a big party kinda girl.. but I get so much love on that day.. I feel so special.. but this year's was bleh.. I wasn't looking forward to it at all.. it was like whatever.. then it hit me when a second past 12 and my phone started t ring.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!.. oh yeah.. I'm 21....O.o 

I was so stressed out that day.. had two major exams the next day.. of which I wasn't ready for.. and would later turn out bad.... still haven't checked the results.. don't have the nerves to...
Ok honestly, the day wasn't a complete disaster..... got t talk t my fam and my bestest friends in the world.. I mean, what more do I need?!?!

Being 21 comes with a whole lot of responsibilities... your adult life already started.. uuggghh.. when did we grow up???... I'm not ready yet.. I'm not where I thought I'd be by the time I turned 21... oh well, "Life's what happens to us while we are busy making other plans"... I'm still thankful tho .. *Alhamdulilah*

I feel like I haven't really grown since I turned 17.... maybe I'm being a little too hard on myself but that's exactly how I feel...

Oh well, that's as far as my unconscious let me go.... it decided to hoard the rest of the feelings as usual.... when I'm more comfortable I'd be back... gotta go to bed.. BIG DAY tomorrow.... it's Boxing Day... and in the States too.. whoop whoop!!!!!!!!!!.... wish I had more money.... right now, shopping is the only thing that gives me JOY!!!

I'M AFRAID....

Like everyone else... I'M AFRIAD of some things... and I'm not afraid to share 'em on this post...

I'm afraid of life after death... yah.. I believe in life after death and I'm certain it will be beautiful.. but it scares me coz I'm not sure if I have made all the right life choices I need to get me to that beautiful side.. another thing that scares me is extinction... How do you just go from living into extinction??.. I mean where does the soul and all that comes with it go??.. you see why I believe in the hereafter??? There has to be a life after death!...

I'm afraid of uncertainty... it scares me a lot.. you never know if today's ur last.. or what's gonna happen the next second.... "not-knowing" is almost the worst feeling.....so it only makes sense to believe in a God.. I mean, something has to be supreme.... and above all this madness called life..... I'm very afraid of GOD 

Moving on... my MAJOR fear may come as a surprise to lots.... but one of my greatest fears is being left alone in the same room or at least 15 feet with a dog... OMG!!!...I'd literally pass out.. I'm afraid of DOGS... I constantly embarrass myself whenever I see one

See, it's not like I hate dogs or can't stand them.. any dog of any age and size intimidates me... that's just my truth...I find them too aggressive... see the way they bark????..
I've had a pretty bad experience with them.. I was told that a dog senses fear.. can smell ur adrenaline rush.. so it's in your best interest to stay calm if you see a dog.... I'm not foolish.. but my first instinct when I see a dog is to run.. and the dog ended up chasing me.... I thought that was IT for me...

The annoying thing is that some dog owners don't acknowledge/believe that dogaphobes ( btw that's a new word and u heard it hear first :P) like me exist.. they don't put their dogs on leash... leaving it wondering around!... well I got news fah y'all S-O-Bs.. I found this thing on a plane catalogue.. I think it's called a "dog zapper".. (I might be wrong)... it's used to zappp dogs that are being naughty.. it mildly electrocutes the dog and weakens it so it's calm... it's not meant to kill or harm the dog.... I'm seriously considering getting one.. and God help me.. I'd zapp any Biatch/Dog that even attempts to come close to me.....

so who's ya daddy huh??.... lol 

I'm afraid of Karma!.. I think everyone should be coz Kay is a biatch!!.. and you don't see her coming.. Bitch gives you more than u bargained for... I try my best not to mess with karma.. coz I know.. that the saying "what goes around, comes around" applies to everything.....

I'm afraid of a naked man who is offering me clothes..... uhhh thanks but no thanks...

I'm afraid of not having a clear conscience at the end of the day..... I wonder how some people sleep at night..

I'm afraid of being stuck in an elevator alone.. I get so so scared and paranoid every time I'm in an elevator alone.. I feel like that's when somethings gonna go wrong.. and that's when I hear sounds that give me the creeps.. :S

I'm afraid of failure..... I don't know how to lose or fail.. sorry!

I'm afraid of the DARK... I sleep with the lights on.. well, that explains the high hydro bills..*sigh